By Allyson Raffel, LMFT, Director of Clinical Services CLE Costa Mesa
I would love to introduce you to a couple who met here at CLE and have cultivated their relationship over the past 11 months. From working with Megan and Eric, I believe them to be a wonderful example of a loving partnership among the student body because they strive for mutual respect. Megan Paciocco is working towards her fashion merchandizing certificate at Orange Coast College. Eric is currently taking exploratory courses at Orange Coast College with interest in child development. They were holding hands throughout the interview and very attentive to each other’s verbalizations.
What was your first impression of each other?
Megan: He was cute and tall and I thought he was my age…I thought you were 21. He was really sweet and he was one of most kind, generous guys I’ve ever dated.
Eric: I like her. I think she’s a very good person. Our roommates are dating each other and if this happens at this time, maybe we can double date?
What is your favorite memory as a couple?
Megan: We went to Disneyland California Adventure together for the first time with my sister and her boyfriend. He (Eric) hadn’t been there for a couple of years so we showed him around. And then my two best friends came and we hanged-around together.
Eric: We went to CA Adventure together, it was in March and I hadn’t been there in 9 years. Also, the first time we went on a date. I had Megan over at my apartment and we watched videos together. One thing that was a kind of a mistake, is that we got together on the Wednesday before Christmas vacation and then Friday came and we had to say goodbye for three weeks.
Megan: But we FaceTimed every day!
Do you have a nickname for each other?
Megan: Owl, because he’s kind of shy around different people, but he talks around me. And Baby, and Babe.
Eric: Meggers, because I love her and I picked up the name from Jennifer Griffith and Joy Francisco. I also call her Baby and Girl.
How does your partner show you support?
Megan: He allows me to talk to him about family and school. If I have anxiety he helps me cope with it and makes me feel good.
Eric: When I leave her she always FaceTimes me and says she wishes I were here. If I have a problem with my parents or school-wise she helps me with that.
What trait do you value most in your partner?
Eric: Is that she’s so lovely and that she loves to have fun.
Megan: How much he cares about people and cares about me, and how he likes to have fun, or sometimes we chill and have fun.
What would your perfect day with your partner look like?
Eric: Me seeing her. Me chilling with her. Me going and coming home with her from CLE after our session.
Megan: Going to Harry Potter Land for our anniversary, because I love Harry Potter and I love Eric, so the two together would be the perfect day. We would have fun and drink butter beer.
What is your inspiration when it comes to relationships?
Megan: This couple named Zoe and Alfie that are YouTuber’s. They have been dating for five years, and she’s the oldest one and he’s the youngest one; so, it reminds me of me and Eric.
Eric: My parents because they’re perfect.
How would you describe your relationship?
Megan: Fun, adventurous, loving and caring.
Eric: Caring, supported, happy.
Have you met each other’s family?
Eric: Yes, they had good impressions of Megan. They like her a lot and really enjoy her.
Megan: So did my parents, too! I told them a little about him when we started dating and they liked him a lot.
How does your partner make you feel safe and protected?
Megan: He makes me feel safe and loved and like nothing would happen to me if I’m with him. Like if something were to happen he would fight for me. At night, if I’m scared, he walks with me.
How do you keep a healthy balance between spending time with your significant other, friends, and having alone time?
Megan: He tells me different dates he’s going see his friends, he gives me a head’s up so then I text my friends to see if they want to hang out. Or I hang out with my family.
Eric: If she’s busy I’ll see what other people are up to.
What are qualities each of you have that blend well in the relationship together?
Megan: I’m strong and can be straightforward, caring, and smart.
Eric: I can’t usually be straight forward, so Megan helps with that. I can be strong for her.
Do you know each other’s goals?
Eric: To live on her own, she’s working to get fashion degree, to finish CLE and graduate from the program.
Megan: He wants to work with kids by helping them. In a couple of years, he wants to leave the program, and wants to drive.
What advice would you give to CLE peers about having a healthy relationship?
Megan: It’s a lot of work, but if you find the right guy to work on some things together, it actually works out well. Find the person who makes you feel loved and special.
Eric: It’s a lot of work, but you can get there. Just work your way through it and eventually get to it.
What would you like to tell your partner?
Megan: I love you so much I care about you don’t be afraid to talk to me about anything.
Eric: I love you so much and don’t be afraid to talk to me.
