What is Normal?

By Sarah Healy, ILS Coordinator CLE Rockville

“If you are always trying to be normal, you will never know how amazing you can be.”
– Maya Angelou

Something one of our students said today in focus group made me think of the above quote from Maya Angelou. Sarah told the group, “I don’t want to be told I’m normal because that’s boring. Everyone has their own unique qualities, quirks, interests, and personalities.” The group agreed, and another student shared that his interests are sometimes viewed as not normal.

Ben enjoys reading comic books and was once told that this is not normal. He was told that he should be doing something else with his life rather than reading comic books. Ben shared with the group, “Reading comics means a lot to me and is a part of who I am. It doesn’t matter if someone else thinks It’s not normal.”

In addition to interests, normality also plays a large role in the classroom. During our conversation a student brought up accommodations for classes, something “normal” people don’t experience. There were different viewpoints on receiving accommodations. Some students are okay that they don’t learn neurotypically and need that extra help that accommodations give them. Others felt as though they were being singled out, and one student felt that getting accommodations made him feel less than others.

The group was encouraging and helped each other see that it is okay not to be normal and it is okay to receive the accommodations they need to be successful. We all agreed that everyone needs help from time to time and it is completely normal to ask for help, even if it doesn’t feel so great.

So, how do we define normal?

Normal means something different to everyone. One student defined normal as being average. Another student compared normalcy to conforming to an ideal. Some saw normal as meaning successful. One student in the group, Detlev, thought of normal in a cultural and societal context, explaining that each culture has their own definition of normal.

Lisa, a mentor related to this and shared a cultural difference she experiences in her family. “My mom is Taiwanese, and she sees normal as going to a four-year school, getting your master’s degree, and becoming a doctor or an engineer. While my dad just wants us to do what makes us happy.”

Normal, according to the dictionary, is defined as “conforming to a standard; usual, typical, or expected.” At CLE, we make our own definition of normal. Normal to us means living well, living comfortably, and living functionally. To be normal is to be yourself.