Changing Our Mindsets from Old Patterns into Healthier, Happier Ones
By Deborah Feketa, ILS Coordinator CLE Denver
You’ve all heard the saying “you can’t teach an old dog new tricks.” However, when it comes to retraining our minds to create new habits of positive thinking to create greater happiness in our lives, the good news is that we CAN change our mindsets from old patterns into new healthier ones.
The best part is that you can do this independent of anyone else! No medications, no therapists and no set time of day to accomplish this. All it takes is a little willpower and commitment. In fact, studies show that a new habit can be formed within 21 to 30 days. In the bigger scope of things, that’s not a whole lot of time!
How is this possible?
You see, our brain acts similarly to a computer processor. It responds accordingly to what you program it with, without judging if something is true or untrue. If you wish to be happier then all you have to do is expose your brain to positive statements, things, people and environments. Since your brain also responds to positive stimuli by producing endorphins and other chemicals, you actually feel better when you are exposing your brain to healthier and more positive influences.
Have you ever been around someone who has the habit of thinking and speaking negative statements and sees limitations in everything? What does this energy feel like? Since energy is also transferrable, how does it make you feel over time?
How about the opposite? What occurs being around someone who makes positive statements, who sees the bright side of things and sees potential? What does this energy feel like? How does it feel to be around this person? Did you ever stop and consider that your happiness actually affects not only yourself but others?
Fortunately, we can change our habits of thought based on what we say or expose ourselves to, which will have a direct effect on our physiological well-being, as well as on others around us. Our ultimate goal is become happier individuals so that we may enjoy life to the fullest.
According to
The Happiness Advantage by Shawn Achor, conventional wisdom holds that if we work hard we will be more successful, and if we are more successful, then we’ll be happy. If we can just find that great job, win that next promotion, lose those five pounds, happiness will follow. But recent discoveries in the field of positive psychology have shown that this formula is actually backward. Happiness fuels success, not the other way around. When we are positive, our brains become more engaged, creative, motivated, energetic, resilient, and productive at work. This isn’t just an empty mantra. This discovery has been repeatedly borne out by rigorous research in psychology and neuroscience, management studies, and the bottom lines of organizations around the globe.
So how can we change the way that we think, develop positive habits and, well, become happier?
Like anything new it will take effort and commitment to create some meaningful changes that you will begin to experience and observe; 21 days is a start! You’ll know that you are really getting somewhere when others begin to comment on your change of status. (P.S… The more motivated you are, the greater the results.)
If you’re aware that you lack self-discipline to get started or to keep on track, as many of us do, then ask others to join you in your efforts. Support from others is most beneficial. Why not create support in the form of a group challenge? Ask others to join you with developing some new habits that they can also do for themselves, which may help you stay better on track. And you’ll also enjoy collaborating and supporting each other with your results as you go.
So what would it look like to train your mind to become healthier and happier?
Here are some actions that you can take on independently to start the process of developing habits to lead to a more positive, happier you!
Do any of the following for at least 21 days consecutively and/or create your own.
When you wake up in the morning, take a moment to think of three things that you are thankful for. Say them out loud. If you’re truly motivated then write them down and extend the exercise to spell out why you are grateful for these things. Studies reveal that using verbal statements along with written ones increases desired results. Feel the emotion of gratitude, which is positive energy that will have you feeling grateful.
When you look at yourself in the mirror verbalize some positive statements about yourself such as “I am beautiful,” “I am loving,” “I have a lot to offer.” Say each statement at least three time daily. What statements can you create for yourself that may be more applicable for what you need? Change these up as often as you need.
See the glass as half full. When something comes your way that doesn’t feel good or is upsetting, take some time afterwards to find the positive or potential in it. There’s always a positive in everything when you have an open mind to what that may be. An example of an unpleasant experience is that you may have received a poor grade on a paper. To have a positive/ open reaction to the experience is to examine the paper with someone else and determine where you need to improve. Identify the skills that you are lacking, learn or improve on these skills and there you go! You are now more skilled than you were when you wrote the paper and you’re ready to apply your new skills for the next challenge. Use your perceived “set-back” to actually propel yourself forward!
Make an effort to consciously smile at least three people a day. Smiling allows your brain to release endorphins which makes you feel good and you’ll notice that almost everyone will automatically smile back at you. They won’t be able to help it because energy is transferable and they too will feel the good energy that you’re passing on! Not good at smiling? Place your mouth over a pencil and hold for a few seconds three times a day and you’ll have the same benefit; the brain only recognizes that your muscles are turned up in the form of a smile; clever, eh?
Participate in at least 15 minutes of fun physical activity every day. Be creative here. How can you achieve 15 minutes of physical activity every day? How about taking the stairs instead of the elevator, walking fast to hear and feel your heart beat, or turning on some music and getting a groove on! You can generally accomplish 15 minutes of dancing in about 4 to 5 songs. No sweat! Be creative, what else can you think of?
Make a short list of three doable tasks to complete for the day. You’ll find that you’re able to accomplish these and not only will you feel good about completing the tasks but you’ll also be on your way to developing a successful mindset. Change these up every day for about a month or so and then plan out some longer-term goals that you make your three daily goals relative to. Do some research and/or seek out support if need be to keep on moving towards your bigger goals. You got this!
Take some action to help yourself achieve success with goals that you desire. For example, if your goal is to get better at playing the guitar but you find yourself stopping at the couch with remote in hand as the first thing you do when you get home, create a different environment. Take the batteries out of the remote and place it far from the coach in another room. Then place the guitar visibly at the side of the couch. Because we are creatures of habit, you’ll find yourself initially on the couch reaching for the remote first, but then you’ll remember that it’s in the other room and without batteries. It’s a good chance you’ll think twice about taking the energy to actually get up to get the remote and install the batteries, but it’s far less effort to pick up the guitar that is staring at you. Pick up the guitar! Get your groove on and once you begin to improve daily from the practice, you’ll be much more motivated and likely find yourself enjoying your new habit while accomplishing your desired goal.
Pay attention to the words that you use to express who you are and how you feel about yourself or other things. Instead of saying “I can’t do this,” replace it with “I can do this!” Again, the brain doesn’t know what is actually true or not true but it will respond to what it is programmed with. Stay away from limiting words such as “never,” and “impossible.” There is and always will be limitless possibility in everything. Don’t believe me? Pick up a book on quantum physics and get ready to get expansive.
So, do you want to create healthier habits to achieve happiness in your life? I thought so! Remember this all starts with you. What are you waiting for? Get started today and become a happier, healthier, more successful you!
